"Well behaved children welcome, the rest..."

This is for Ergie and Steve, with whom we were out last night. Having seen, and been fascinated by, this sign at High Storrs School, Sheffield, they suggested I write a verse on the subject.

"Well behaved children are welcome:
The rest will be made into pies."

We've a casserole dish at the ready,
And a cleaver to cut them to size.

If acquainted with Titus Andronicus,*
You may well be in for a treat.

Unless you've ensured they're brought up well,
It could be your sons that you'll eat.

*For those not familiar with Shakespeare's blood-thirsty play of this name, Titus Andronicus served up to Queen Tamora the heads of her two sons in a pie - an act of revenge.

For details of my other books - Britannia's Glory and James the Third - please see the blog/post of each, both dated October 2024.