Wednesday, 30 October 2013

"Pride and Prejudice" unresolved

It's the template
For every romance ever written.
Our pair start as foes,
Then admit they're both smitten.

Elizabeth Bennet
Is forthright and plucky,
But in finding true love,
She has not been that lucky.

Mr Darcy is dashing,
Is rich and aloof,
And seems to have made himself
Gold-digger proof.

There are misunderstandings.
They spar and they fight,
Then all is explained 
And their future looks bright.

This book is a masterpiece:
Just has one blot
That mars very slightly
Its wonderful plot.

Fitzwilliam's his name -
Too long, must be said,
So what does she call him,
When tucked up in bed?

Does she shorten it somehow,
To Fitz or to Willie?
Or worse, find a nickname
That's cute, naff or silly?

Monday, 28 October 2013

The Duchess of Cambridge's hats

Welcome to our new viewers in Cambodia. Your impressive flag has happily settled itself somewhere in the middle of "Hello World".

I truly have missed my vocation.
Writing verses is not where it's at.
I should've embarked on another career,
Designing the ultimate hat.

I've studied the Duchess of Cambridge:
The photos all seemingly show
Stunning headgear is easy to fashion:
All you need is a large piece of dough -

Of the kind that is used to make pizza,
Leave it egg shaped, then put it together
By adding a frill or a wisp at the back
Made of net, or some wire, or a feather.

The format is not rocket science
And seems like a bit of a doddle,
There's now just one hitch with my venture -
I need someone famous to model.

Tuesday, 22 October 2013

The Royal Christening

Welcome to new viewers in Oman, Bulgaria, Hong Kong, Thailand and Kuwait. Your flags have been added to "Hello World".

When a baby's newborn
He can look very wizened.
At three months, however,
He's fit to be christened.

To the world he's presented
And now can be seen.
He resembles a child,
Not some dried up old bean.

At last he has reached
An appropriate age,
When - looking half-human -
He takes centre stage.

He'll be dressed in a gown
Which is frilly, not dashing,
To face lots of cameras
All clicking and flashing.

Will he cry like his Dad did,
And screw up his face?
It cannot be comfy
All shrouded in lace.

Who'll be the godparents?
A fact that's concealed.
They have posh names (with hyphens),
And all be well-heeled.

The wedding cake had
An enormous top tier,
For just this occasion
Designed to appear.

George won't understand
What the fuss is about,
But, like it or not,
His whole future's mapped out.

Let's hope he has scope
And can do his own thing.
Even though this small baby
Was born to be king.